Briefing time with General Schwarzkopf was never a pleasant time.  He demanded nothing short of perfection from his officers, and he did not like surprises.
The General did not appear happy that morning.  It was evident that something did not sit well with him.
"This is supposed to be a secret exercise.  There are not supposed to be any civilians allowed in the training area," said the General with a Scowl.  "I was told that there are people from the International Red Cross on post.  Who the hell is responsible for this?"

LTC (Doc) Harry Price shakily stood up.  "General, those were not civilians.  That was my Sergeant Eagle and his reactors." 

Evidently my bad Irish Accent and my Magic Marker Pen illustrated card was enough to convince them of my authenticity. 

The General seemed to be relieved and so was LTC (Doc) Harry.

We had ample props and we decided that we needed to test the 7^th I.D. Command further. 

A young Captain from our Santa Barbara Unit, had brought with him a beautiful classic Mercedes Sedan.   We decided that it would be the ideal vehicle for us to use as a Lusandian Police cruiser
.   
That afternoon, A man dressed in a brown police uniform stepped out of the Mercedes accompanied by a lovely, but poorly dressed woman.    They walked, unchallenged into the middle of a military encampment.   The woman stopped, and then pointed at what appeared to be the lowest ranking person there.   "That's him!"  She shrieked. "That's the man that raped me!"

The "Police man" immediately grabbed the accused bewildered soldier and hand cuffed him.

Everyone just stared. 

Another one of our group went and gathered up some clothing items belonging to the private and we departed.

The soldiers and his immediate commander appeared stunned.

Our intent was to have them exercise their chain of command to get their man released.   

Days passed and nothing happened.

Private Snuffy (I don't remember his real name) was very pleased to be our prisoner.  The first thing that I did was take him to the off limits snack bar and buy him a hot meal.   We then decided that it might be better to have him disappear during the day, so I arranged for him to be driven to Camp Roberts, where he could enjoy their snack bar and swimming pool.

We eventually had to sit down with "Snuffy's" commander, and review the steps necessary for the release of his soldier.

It was a sad day for Private Snuffy when we finally had to bring him back.

None of this escaped General Schwarzkopf's notice, and once again, Col (Doc) Harry had to report to him about Private Snuffy's progress.

Almost a month had gone by and the morale of the 7^th I.D. Army Band was not at its best.  Their prisoner of war camp duties took up a great deal of their time, and their musicians had few opportunities to practice or play. 

The Band Director sent a message to us.  He asked if we could provide them with an opportunity (within the context of this exercise) to perform as musicians. 

Our brilliant script writers took advantage of this opportunity to write a scenario where the President of Lusanda was killed.  I was to play the part of the Mayor of San Jose (the capitol of Lusanda).  I would make a speech and the band would perform. 

Once again it was an unbearably hot Hunter Liggett day.  We had a casket (I don't know where they got it) draped with the Lusandian flag.  I wore my hot checkered polyester suit as I gave a rousing and very patriotic speech. The band played.  It was fun.

"You know" said I to an officer who was standing next to me.  "I have always wanted to visit the Hunter Liggett Officers Club.  I have heard stories about the murals on the walls.  They were painted by a soldier during World War II.  He never went overseas, but spent the entire war painting.   I would really love to see those murals."

As "Mayor" I was chauffeured to the funeral in the antique Mercedes.  The two officers that were with me had VIP arm bands.  They looked at each other and said "Why Not?"

As we entered the Officers Club, I was introduced to the manager as "The Mayor of San Jose."   

It was with a great deal of deference and consideration that I was shown around the club.  We had a nice meal that evening, and then retired back to our GP Medium Tent.

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