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Please note that the TOP 10 is normally not written by Bill Eagle (unless his name is attached) nor does it necessarily reflect the opinions of Bill Eagle, his wife, children, pastor, pets, real or past friends (assuming that he has any at all). Top 10 Things Not To Say To Your New Girlfriend’s Parents From Tammy (who got it from someplace on the Internet).
10. My parole officer thinks your daughter has a calming effect on me.
9. Did you see that flying saucer that hovered over the town yesterday?
8. I am surprised that you haven’t told your daughter about the Lizard people.
7. Can you believe that those idiots at the market won’t cash my welfare check
6. We need to keep our relationship quiet. My wife can be quite vindictive.
5. In my opinion, those home pregnancy kits aren’t all that reliable.
4. Your daughter is so pretty, I’ve decided to give up being bisexual just for her.
3. You’ve got a nice place. That painting looks expensive. I bet a nice home like yours comes with a built in safe.
2. I am really happy, my HIV test came back negative! I bet your daughter will be okay too.
1. Can I pull my car into your garage? I’m not sure how long that cop care will stay lost.
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